Toward the end of 2019 I felt well enough to try to tackle a long put off visit to the old country. With two stents installed and most of the known arterial blockages in my heart held open, after three and a half years, I was working full time even though I had to use most of my time off being unwell and unable to work. I had worked hard to hide just how debilitating my condition was to my family, so my biggest concern was that they would not accomodate the things I needed to be able to do this trip…

My first appointment with my cardiologist couldn’t happen soon enough, but their case loads tend to be formidable. Heart disease is the number one killer of Americans after all. I was figuratively and literally dying to know what was next…

I tried to open my eyes but they were welded shut with clotted blood. I tried to sit up but my body completely ignored my will and refused to budge. I felt a brief rush of relief as I drew another breath, knowing that I had made it through the night…

A week after I left, the shelter manager called me to let me know that Marcie did well at the vet and her cough had improved. I returned to the shelter to pay for the vet and pay Marcie a visit. This time the shelter was full of dogs…

The very first thing I noticed when I got home was how cold I was. An overwhelming numbness had shielded me from any sense of tremendous injury, dysfunction, or pain, but that wore away in stages over a few days. The cold was oppressive and unrelenting and saw me shivering while huddled under my blankets…

From the cath lab I was wheeled directly to the ICU. A collagen plug was holding my femoral artery closed with its anchor stabbed through a major nerve. I was gritting my teeth through incredible pain while being told that I shouldn’t move at all, not even to turn my head, and that I should try to suppress any sneeze or cough…

Fifteen years before my trip to the cath lab, I awoke and rose before the hot Texas sun climbed above the horizon. There was something a little unusual about that morning – as freshman cadets we were conditioned to be constantly harassed by the upperclassmen, a cheerful component of an education meant to reduce our counterproductive reactions to stress. This morning the harassment was suspiciously minimal, aside from having to dress in our formal uniforms for morning exercises…

I did what any sensible 33 year old man would do. I threw myself off a mountain on a bike. Rode world-class whitewater both inside and outside of a raft…

I can’t say that I have no idea where my heart issues came from, there were a few clues. About a year before my heart attack, I had been working for the same company for six years, I was in deeply in love with a girl that I had been dating for two years, and I was finally feeling at home in an apartment I had been living in for one year…

I’m writing a series of stories by which to explain myself so that the people associated with me don’t have to keep doing it. My hope is to eventually publish this as a book that will help perhaps some people gather some of my wisdom without having to live through my lessons. Please do send me any of your free and clear comments should you wish to do so…